Please read this...Simple little project becomes a PROJECT

<p class="p1">This week, we're going to attempt to take up the theological implications of home improvement projects. Make a note, please: if you happen to disapprove of an attempt at humor which involves a deity, or, well, THE DEITY, PLEASE STOP READING RIGHT NOW.</p><p class="p1">One day recently, I had a brief chat with a fellow traveler on the Journey Through Life. Seems that he was engaged in a project at home which had exploded into a PROJECT, as often happens.</p><p class="p1">Seems that the PROJECT began with moving something. Pretty soon, he was adding a third story* to his house, because the thing that was being moved probably didn't have a place to go anymore.</p><p class="p1">You've probably had this happen, too. Let's say that you want to put a new paper towel hanger in the kitchen. Right over the sink. </p><p class="p1">There's already a perfectly functional paper towel hanger in the kitchen. Right over the sink. Never mind about that.</p><p class="p1">You've decided that the paper towel hanger which has been there forever has, well, pretty much been there forever. It's still functional, as functional as a paper towel hanger needs to be. It's just time for a change.</p><p class="p1">You determine that the paper towel hanger is held on the wall over the kitchen sink by two screws. These are "regular" screws, in that they do not require a Phillips head screw driver, which may, or may not, be the name of an actual tool. I do not know. The Other Half does not allow me to use real tools very often. </p><p class="p1">Anyway, you find the right screw driver and proceed to remove the two screws. </p><p class="p1">The first screw comes out of the wall without a problem. </p><p class="p1">The second screw – not so easy.</p><p class="p1">For some reason, the second screw does not want to move. At all. You put all of your manliness into the effort. The screw driver breaks. The screw is still in the wall.</p><p class="p1">You determine that another tool might work more better. You find a hammer. And another screw driver. And a pair of pliers. You go at it again.</p><p class="p1">SNAP!!!!! KAPOW!!!!! ZOWEE!!!!</p><p class="p1">You immediately wonder how Batman, Robin and the Penguin showed up in your kitchen. </p><p class="p1">Before you can figure that out, you realize that the paper towel hanger somehow has fallen off the wall and slammed into the cold water faucet, which, unexplainedly, shatters into small pieces. </p><p class="p1">You now have a geyser of ice cold water gushing into your face. The Other Half, who has been taking a nap, wants to know if everything is OK. You attempt to respond, but you are drowning in a deluge of ice cold water.</p><p class="p1">She comes into the kitchen and finds the water shut off valve under the kitchen sink. She also determines that paper towel hanger, which at some point became a potentially deadly projectile, also had slammed a gaping hole in the kitchen sink.</p><p class="p1">She quickly determines that the time has come to call a "contractor." The contractor arrives and determines that the repair work will involve replacing the entire kitchen, from floor to ceiling. We go to the bank and borrow a large sum of money. The banker tries not to chuckle when The Other Half tells her what happened. </p><p class="p1">Six months later, we have a new kitchen. We look around. There's no paper towel hanger. </p><p class="p1">All of this led me to consider the Biblical story of creation. You know. The story in the Old Testament Book of Genesis which recalls how THE Big Guy created the universe in seven days.</p><p class="p1">I am going to go way out on a limb here and suggest that THE Big Guy really just wanted a new paper towel hanger in His kitchen. Never mind that he already had a really nice paper towel hanger. He's the Almighty, for goodness sake. He can have whatever kind of paper towel hanger he wants.</p><p class="p1">Nevertheless, He still decides He wants a new paper towel hanger. So, He starts to take down the old paper towel hanger. The process does not go well at all. The project began on the First Day. Due to circumstances beyond His control, whatever those might, or could be, it takes seven days to replace the paper towel hanger. </p><p class="p1">At some point, He smashes His thumb. He mutters something which is mistaken for thunder by those of us down below. By the time He gets to the seventh day of the project, He is completely worn out. He decides to take a rest. And call a contractor.</p><p class="p1">(*I made this part up.)</p>


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